My Blog ...

Welcome to MY BLOG...
to MY ramblings, MY rants MY rages & MY opinions...
this blog is MINE ... it's all about ME,
it's my opinions, my personal feelings & ramblings, my rants and my rages ...
What I want to say, how I WANT to say it about the subjects I want to talk about ...
It is not my intention to upset, belittle, degrade, confuse or demean anyone, it is purely 1 wacky, crazy woman's point of view ... AND
If you don't like what I have to say ... then don't read it !!!

Saturday, 30 July 2011

So... it's weekend again

and guess what ... we have NO RUGBY matches to attend !!! well we could be going to support The Sharks this afternoon... they are playing at home ... but Kelsey doesn't want to !!!

Thanks to the unpredictable and crazy weather we've had this past week club rugby training was cancelled on Wednesday night and again last night ... and the 1st match of The Colts season should have been taking place tomorrow ... but that too was cancelled ...

Then you look at the beautiful day we've had today and you have to ask WHY ??? (was the matches cancelled I mean ... it's gorgeous outside and I'm sure all the water-logged fields would have been fine by tomorrow) ... but hey I'm just a rugby supporter ... what do I know LOL ... But the powers to be cancelled and that's it ...

And when you're someone like me who needs to have my life planned well in advance, a last minute cancellation like this ... just throws me into a state of total confusion ...

I mean the balance of my week last week was just another blur of nothing-ness ... it has rained all week and been wet & cold & miserable so I've actually been very grateful for the nothing-ness ... it meant school run in the morning ... home to my new best friend ... (my blankie wrapped around my legs)... lots of hot tea/chocolate/coffee ... lots of comfort foods and then only needing to move from my slouch in time for pick up... and SON-shine choosing to do no sports at school this term means we're home by 3pm every day ... in fact I'm thinking maybe this is not so good .. I'm thinking this is only adding to the SADS ... the lack of physical activity !!! NOT a good thing really ...

And then here we are at the weekend and hey we're getting to be professionals at the nothing-ness ... I asked SON-shine if he wanted to go out somewhere today ... and when he said NO I jumped for joy ... another day at home ... on the slouch couch !!!

But I do have to mention ... on Thursday I was very proud of myself ... I actually had every reason to loose my temper ... throw a hissy fit ... and you know what ... I was in total control !!! I had a meeting with the Sally, Leanne & Carol, ladies from The Sports Committee on Thursday after school ... the meeting was about Sports Dinner... but that's another story ...

Let me get back to Thursday ... I had told SON-shine I was going to be in the meeting and he must just wait for me ... now we all come out of meeting and we're chatting (as you do) in the car park, SON-shine comes up to me with Britani (Sally's daughter, who is killing herself laughing... SON very sombre at this point) eventually we find out the joke ... Brit tells SON-shine he can leave his school bag in Sally's Bakkie if he wants ... so he goes over to a 'white bakkie' that he thinks is Sally's and he dumps his bags in there ...

Guess what ... yup it was NOT Sally's bakkie he'd dropped his bags into ... in fact he had NO IDEA whose car it was !!! and it has gone ... and so has his school bag with all his books, pens etc. as well as the new jumper I'd only bought him on Wednesday and his rugby skins too !!!

I just stood there ... I really had nothing to say ... (I'm telling you these pills I'm on are brilliant!!!) BUT I did tell him I was NOT going to replace anything ... at all ... he was going to have to explain to his teacher why he had no school books, no pens etc... why his homework was not done ... and I also told him I didn't care if he froze to death I was NOT buying him new skins or jumper !!! (but girls this was all done ...calmly)

LUCKILY for him ... Brit knew someone else who had a car similar to her mums ... who checked his vehicle ... no it wasn't in there.. then through a process of elimination and a couple of really helpful kids we eventually were able to track down the owner of the vehicle where he had dropped his bags ... and even though no-one knew his number ... someone knew someone etc... and finally I was able to chat to the owner of the 'Random White Bakkie' ... SON-shine was even luckier still cos he was still in the Hillcrest area and he agreed to meet up with me to give me back Kelsey's bags !!! I drove calmly through Hillcrest to retrieve the bags (and yes I have to keep harping on about how calm I was cos that is so NOT like me !!!)

Well SON-shine has been on his best behaviour for the rest of the week LOL ... but he did ask on Thursday night after collecting his bags "who are you and what have you done with my mother !!!"

And that was my weekly dose of drama for last week ... hey my life just would not be the same if I did'nt have some sort of a drama LOL

So now the rest of the weekend ... another beautiful day today (SUNDAY)... I know it's taken me 2 days to get this blog written & posted ... had sooo much of nothing-ness to do in between LOL... but we're off out now so thought I better get it posted before another day goes by ...

"OUT !" I hear you say ... yes popping over to Lawrence & Penny's new place (yes new place again ... I think this is the 5th house they've been in since we got here 3 years ago !!!) Its's Penny's birthday through the week so we're going for coffee & cake this afternoon ... well it is a beautiful day and seems such a shame to waste it ....

Wednesday, 27 July 2011

Hitting the ground running ...

that's exactly how it's been since we arrived back in SA 'A WEEK AGO' !!! what the ... a week already ???

Our return flight was uneventful ... I was very grateful for the help the check - in lady gave us when we were 4kg over weight "I can't be blamed for anything that goes into your hand luggage between check in and boarding" ... so we had to take 4 kg out of my suitcase ... just to put it into my hand luggage ... WTF !!!

But I got the 'goodies' I wanted here this time LOL ... Now Paul just has to remember to pack all the things on the bed upstairs and out of the box and my bedroom cupboard ... over the next 2 trips and Christmas will be sorted for me too LOL ... and he really thought us going to the UK was going to be 'cheaper' in the long run .... NOT !!! {sorry love :-) }

We were both blerdy knackered when we got back ... mum had made a pan full of homemade broth for our return and it was food, shower and bed ... slept like the dead ... but that 5.30am wake up call was a major shock to the system ... talk about back to reality with a BANG !!!

Kelsey struggled to get his head around getting up in the dark ... and we felt the chills as we got dressed ... and off to school ... thankfully he didn't miss out on too much work in the 2 days we were away ... we just had to catch up on some reading ... but "young man ... that better NOT be blonde streaks in your hair ... and they better not be there tomorrow for uniform inspection, otherwise you will get a detention" ... kak ... we didn't get away with it ... I'd already bought a 'brown' hair dye during Wednesday while he was at school ... Wednesday night poor kid was thrown into club rugby training with a vengeance ... and after a science experiment gone wrong to get the blonde streaks back to brown ... with a dash of Mahogany Ginger in between ... he crashed into bed exhausted again...

I had to unpack at least 1 of the cases on Thursday ... the one with Girlfriends Gift in ... MUM have to make sure I give it to her this week it's our 1 month anniversary (OMG !!!) and so she knows I missed her ... (young love LOL)

I don't know what the hell happened to Wednesday, Thursday or even Friday for that matter LOL

Oh wait I remember Friday night was Club Rugby training and then it was "mum can I stay over at Heine's place " ... Lynette told me H had really missed K over the holidays ... those 2 are inseparable ... 2 peas out the same pod ... and that is frightening LOL ...so in fact I didn't see my son again till Sunday afternoon!!!

And I have to say I was very very grateful for that ... after the chaos of our 1st week back and the VERY COLD Friday night at club rugby ... along with the bugs I'm sure I picked up on the plane ...(even though I took all the 'stuff' recommended to take for anti-viral etc. etc.) I was woman down by Friday night ... overdosed myself on FLU remedies ... crashed into bed ... slept till after 8am Saturday ... took another dose and crashed again till 1pm !!! and then after watching a bit of disaster rugby on Saturday (Wallabies beating the Boks 36-20) ... crashed back into bed again by 8pm ... what a pleasure ... couldn't have done that if K had been home ... so a huge thanks to Lynette & Gerard for letting their son no.2 stay for the weekend LOL

So this week hopefully our lives will start to take on some sort of organised 'chaos' ...

Monday we woke to dull overcast and cold winds ... and it started raining by 10am ... and here we are Wednesday 12noon and it's still raining !!! Even SNOW in some parts of KZN ... the MAIN ROAD to JHB is closed ... van Reenen Pass is totally closed and has been for the last 24hours ... see they do get snow in Africa !!! Just not at Christmas ....but I have to say this weathers by far the WORST we've had since we got here 3 years ago ... I'm sitting here writing this with : 4 layers on the upper body ... Jeans, boots and a blanket wrapped around my legs ... IT IS BLERDY BLERDY COLD ...

Kelsey asked me to take cash to school today when I pick him up so I can buy him a LONG sleeved school jersey !!!! He NEVER had one in the UK ... wouldn't wear one ... but honestly I know I moan a lot about the weather BUT this is absolutely ridiculous ... Paul I don't care HOW MUCH it's going to cost but I HAVE to have some sort of 'central heating' in my new house ... or underfloor or some way to keep warm ... cos my body is aching from the weight of the clothes I'm having to wear to keep warm ... (not going to go on and on and on about it BUT !!!!)

And here I am Wednesday ... and all I've managed to achieve so far this week ... suitcases unpacked ... empty cases in the garage ... some washing done ... (as long as you're happy to have the drier going all hours) caught up on my e-mails ... did some food shopping for the house and now I'm blogging ... what the hell !!!

Met up with the 'Blonde Army of 2' on Monday morning to give them back the books I'd covered for the school ... had NO coffee mornings yet ... had no breakfasts with the gals yet ... in fact we are all in DEEP hibernation ... Oh actually I had to go out today cos Indiana 4 Paws has same 'Doggy Gastro' Princess Kleo had before we went away ... so I've had her at the vets this morning ...

Oh and there's a huge pan of Pea & Ham Soup on the Hob .... and THAT'S ALL FOR NOW FOLKS !!!

Sunday, 24 July 2011

Had to share this ... to all my MOTHER friends ...

MOTHERS

Real Mothers don't eat quiche;

They don't have time to make it..

Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils

Are probably in the sandbox.

Real Mothers often have sticky floors,

Filthy ovens and happy kids.

Real Mothers know that dried play dough

Doesn't come out of carpets.

Real Mothers don't want to know what

The vacuum just sucked up...

Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?'

And get their answer when a little voice says, 'Because I love you best.'

Real Mothers know that a child's growth is not measured by height or years or grade...

It is marked by the progression of Mummy to Mum to Mother......


The Images of Mother

4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mummy can do anything!

8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mum knows a lot! A whole lot!

12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't know everything!

14 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother? She wouldn't have a clue. .

16 YEARS OF AGE - Mum? She's so five minutes ago.

18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!

25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it!

35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mum's opinion.

45 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mum would have thought about it?

65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mum.


The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure she carries,

or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes,

Because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.

The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole,

but true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.

It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows,

and the beauty of a woman with passing years only grows!

Saturday, 16 July 2011

Hard to believe it ...

(started writing this on 16th july !!!)
But our 3 weeks holidays are almost OVER !!! Not good !!!

And ... how was this last week ???

Sunday we made an executive decision and stayed at home ... having a lazy day in ... slept late ... watched TV ... ate too much food ... the boys decided that we had to have a Braai ... yes a braai not a BBQ cos we ate steaks and there were no Beans LOL ...

Sort of sorted some of my stuff out ... managed to do some washing ... well actually all I think I managed to do was move a few bags around here and there ... haha!!!

Then Monday I started all over again ... had a trip to good old Mansfield ... even though I don't have much positive to say about the place still managed to come home with a few bags ...enough said LOL ..

Tuesday met up with Irana ... we had lunch at Dobbies ... of course just had to have a look around there too ... whoops a few more bags !!!

On Wednesday morning I had a doctors appointment ... no not that I'm sick or anything ... thought as I'm still paying my dues I may as well have a quick MOT ... doc gave me another 24 months road worthiness LOL !!!

Then I met up with Gussey for lunch followed by CRT (Craft Retail Therapy) at Once Upon a Stamp... great to see Gordon again... Rob wasn't in and I'm told by the ladies he's hardly ever there these days ... seems the man is kept busy with all the 'NEW' stuff he's designing ... you go Rob !!! And don't forget to keep us all updated !!!

Thursday morning it was coffee, followed by another coffee with Ann and a nice long catch up ... we went to the Castle Coffee shop ... do you know I've still never managed to get around that Castle !!! I promise ... it was on my list of things to do for sure this time !!! BUT !!! ran out of time AGAIN !!! ... then after coffee I made a quick dash up to Barnsley again to collect some stuff I'd ordered from The Craft Box ... and on my way back down the M1 I popped into Meadowhell ... well it was'nt an accidental pop in ... I had to collect some more 'stuff' from there that I'd ordered ... and I was meeting JJ for catch-up and dinner ... yet another great day spent with friends ...

Thursday the boys had decided to take the day off and go fishing ... spend some good quality father & son time ... and apparently they both caught something ... even a small catch is a catch !!!

And then it was onto Friday ... I did'nt have anything PLANNED but I needed to pop into Chesvegus ... and I had to finally see the large Tesco there too ... BUT I was home by 3pm to start packing ...

And So I've shopped up a storm ... have I got everything ... NO ... what I've got do I need ...NO but I so WANTED everything I've bought ...

Saturday (16th) we made another family descision and it was haircut for SON-shine ... and the family 'thang' of having our feet nibbled on by Garra Rufa Fish !!! What a really great relaxing afternoon we had ... the look on the boys faces when the fish first started 'nibbling' especially Kelsey as he hates having anyone or thing touch his feet ... and Saturday night ended with a fantastic meal out at one of our favourite places The Dynasty in Chesvegus with Jane & Nigel ...aaaahhh good food with good friends ...

BUT our holiday was still not over ... Sunday (17th) I attempted a bit of packing before we went of to Colleen & Robs for an afternoon with the Bawden Clan ... a lovely Roast Pork dinner ... some great company and a perfect end to our holidays ...

AND now today ... 3 suitcases packed & ready ... gonna push our luck and try to take the MAXIMUM weight we can ... if we don't get away with it Paul will bring the smaller suitcase home ... and he'll just have to bring it out with him in October LOL ... but I'm hoping we'll have a nice sympathetic person when we check in and they'll let us have all 3 cases ...

Then Kelsey & I have that long awful journey back to South Africa (again) !!!

Saturday, 9 July 2011

What ... our 2nd week over already ...

Aaaaa this is so not fair !!! the time is going way too fast ... and my list doesn't seem to be getting any shorter ... in fact it seems to be getting longer !!!

Once I'd started the craft shopping I decided I just had to carry on with it ... so Wednesday saw me popping over to Trimcraft and seeing all the girls there ... picked up the odd bargain or 200 !!! hehehehe ... No actually I was very reserved ... could very easily have slipped back into the old habit of over spending ... but thinking 'mmm' less spending on crafts... more spending on clothes (hehehehe) ... and well really clothes are my thang at the moment (LOL) ... the crafts will be there later :-)

By the time I got home the boys had made a management decision and we were off to the movies to see Pirates of the Caribbean 4 !!! It was great ... now there just HAS to be a 5 !!!

Then when we got home the house was bloody freezing ... well actually I was blerdy freezing in the movies ... wind had picked up and then it rained !!! Grrrr and then there was something going on with the central heating ... typical ... the boys didn't care ... so I just had to have me a tired, cold hissy fit ... but on a positive note ... it meant Paul knew there was something wrong with the central heating !!! (oh and the boys apparently fixed it !!! we'll see)

Thursday morning I attempted to get up early ... well I set my alarm ... got up early ... started going through all the mail that had piled up for me... which also happened to be a few catalogues ...mmmmm more crafting stuff !!! and before I knew it, it was 12noon ... and I still hadn't decided what I was going to be getting up to ... so I took myself off to McArthur Glen ... or Midlands Designer Outlets as it's now known ... the boys joined me there for lunch ... not such a good idea ... those 2 are a nightmare to go shopping with ... and after lunch I sent the boys home to do some housework LOL ...Hey I never realised just how big that place was ... every other time I've been there I've managed to get to Cotton Traders and Claire's Accessories and no further ... this time after 2 hours in Cotton Traders (well I was rugby shirt shopping ... not necesarrily all for me folks !!!) I managed to have a good old rummage around all the shops ... walked away with just the ODD bargain (PMSL, don't think I've done this much 'shopping' in at least a year ROFLMAO)

So I've done a few things on the list ... even started my Christmas shopping !!! yes you read right CHRISTMAS !!! So that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it ... basically I'm getting all the things on my list and doing the next 6 months shopping too ... (good plan ... do you think it's working ??? do you think I can continue to get away with it ???)

Friday I met up with Mrs Mc and after a catch up over a cuppa ... we set off up the M1 to Barnsley ... visited our usual haunts ... popped into the Button Mill for lunch ... yet another Faulty Towers sketch ... it had Sharon & I rolling with laughter ... you know it's bad when you walk into a pub ... with no customers in at lunch time ... you ask if they are doing food and the guy behind the bar says ... yes but let me tell you what we DON'T have on the menu .... it takes him longer to tell you what's NOT on the menu that what is !!! Hysterical ... but not too bad food as long as you don't worry about the 'clean' cutlery LOL ...

Sharon & I had a great afternoon of craft shopping at the CraftBox at Elsecar ... people ... in case you decide to pop over there in the near future ... they have moved ... not too far away ... they are still in Elsecar Heritage Centre ... just not in the corner shop anymore ... they are further along in the centre. A much bigger shop with a load of space for workshops etc... get in touch with Lynn there she'll be only too happy to help you out with anything you're looking for...

I'd decided that we were going to have Fish & Chips for dinner on Friday night and Sharon told me the best place for cod & chips in our area ... 'Fillets' in Mansfield ... opposite ASDA ... well let me tell you peeps ... on Friday night I had the bestest EVER fish & chips with mushy peas .... I felt like I was in gourmet heaven ... even better than any seaside fish & chips !!!

And then onto today ... Kelsey decided it was his turn to go shopping ... Oh well if we have to!!! LOL ... let me tell you ... tonight Paul is wearing a black arm band ... I think today was the MOST expensive day out shopping since we got here ... Kelsey sweet talked his dad into letting him have his Birthday present early ... a computer DJ mixing desk thingy !!! and then he ordered his next 6 months of PS3 games !!! and to top it all off I walked out of the shops with a new 2TB HD ... well I needed an upgrade to store all my photos !!! Oh and I also stocked up on all our DVD's that we've been missing !!! Poor Paul (*evil grin*)

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

Next Chapter ...

So Saturday I was very good ... managed to stay in my £ 20.00 budget ... in fact came home with 53p change !!! ... think I got some really good bargains ... lacy T-shirts for £ 2.00 and a lovely blingy bracelet that I could 're-string' if necessary for a whole £ 1.00 !!! and books ... 3 for a £ 1.00 ... so why did we not go to car boots before ??? hehehehe!!!

Saturday night spoilt Paul by cooking him one of his favourite dinners ... Spaghetti Bolognaise, that went down a treat ...

Sunday when we woke the weather was beautiful ... but it was a unanimous vote to have a lazy do-nothing day .... had brunch in the garden ... went through all my catalogues that had piled up here while I've been away ...ooh if only I had lots of money ... so much 'I want' ...

Finally finished reading the book I started about a month ago !!! Oh this is what holidays are all about !!!

Sunday night cooked another one of Paul's favourite dinners ... Bacon & Cheese Pasta Bake with a lovely fresh green salad that Kelsey made ... yes teaching my Son-shine to be a good husband...

Monday when I woke I thought it was going to be a cooler day ... it was a bit overcast to start off with but turned out to be a really beautiful day. As the boys had left early I was undecided what exactly to do with myself ... but I'd promised mum I would try and get her passport renewed while I was here ... so a trip to Chesterfield was necessary ... couldn't get the passport sorted ... long story !!! but did have some fun mooching around good old Chesvegus ... managed to cross a few more thangs on my 'shopping list' ... found a few bargains too !!! hehehe ... another *evil laugh* ... (Paul is really gonna have a few things in his suitcases for the next couple of trips LOL)

And as I'd had such a tough day 'shopping' {again} there was NO WAY I was gonna be cooking tea ... so a quick stop at Dominoes Pizza and food was sorted ...
:-}

And then ... onto today ... was up nice and early ... put on the glad rags and off to meet up with Gussey Tucker :-} .... what a great day catching up ... managed to get ourselves lost a few times on the way to Pontefract ... but did eventually find Craftzone again ... had a couple of hours 'therapy' ... picked up a new technique from the gals there ... (thanks gals) ... and then onto Lunch, which was hysterical ... we were almost in a Faulty Towers sketch ... Gussey was at the stage of almost asking ... "well what is on the menu and we'll have that" LOL .... and guess what ... we managed to get lost getting out of Pontefract too hehehehe !!!

It does a person good to spend time laughing ......

Saturday, 2 July 2011

and the holiday continues ...

where did I end... oh yes Wednesday done & dusted ...

Thursday morning woke up and thought oooh a bit of sunshine ... so decided I'd be adventurous and wear crop jeans ... that lasted all of 15mins... it started raining and once I walked outside it was blerdy chilly so it was back inside and long jeans on LOL...

Gonna start a 'things you forget' list:
1. Fields filled with poppies .... what a beautiful sight... MUST get me a photo of that !!!
2. How cold summer is here in UK and how cold the rain is too!!!
3. Driving is MPH not KPH!!! ooops
4. How late the day starts & ends ... Paul only goes out to work about 8.30ish !!! by then SA side KB been at school over an hour, I've been up 3 hours !!! By 10pm I'm falling asleep and he's still watching TV !!!
5. Hayfever !!! aaaargh
6. £1.00 = R 11.00 ... so keep doing the maths before you go mad as say it's only a quid !!! But if you see a SALE buy from it LOL ... that's international PMSL !!!

So onto Thursday ... once I'd chosen the right clothes got in the car ... drove to the top road and said ... left Chesterfield, right Mansfield ... I'd decided we had to get some 'proper' food in the house so it was right towards Mansfield... called into JTF on the way ... BEEG mistake ... stocked up on the stationery for SA, the medical stuff for SA, and silly stuff only stocked at JTF !!! LOL
So the boys called me at lunch time and it was "where shall we meet for lunch" ... ASDA's just around the corner ... and that was me gone for the rest of the day ... no site of Mansfield town centre LOL

Did you know I can spend 4 hours in ASDA and not even reach the food section ... I do believe I have a problem ... Shoppers Anonymous here I come ... Never used to be like this ... gonna blame the girlfriends in SA ... they all wear funkyliscious clothes and look good ... so now I must compete with them (that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it !!!) ... but even Paul commented on the fact that I clothes shop now .... before I was addicted to 'craft shopping' hehehe ... (haven't even started that yet Oooops ... Paul you did not just see that bit LOL)

So I finally reached the food section ... bought a 'bake @ home pizza' and made my way home ... the boys were out a gym so I unpacked my wares ... did the typical ooh & aaah again ... had to find a home for all the stuff I bought ... think my bags are already overweight ... and it's only day 3 !!! and so we had Pizza for dinner and I crashed into bed exhausted by 10pm ...

Friday ... the boys decided a trip to Meadow-hell was in order ... now I'm not a big fan of that place ... ooops the new me is apparently ... dragged the boys kicking and screaming into clothes shops, boutiques and all ... what has happened to me ??? Even I'm starting to get worried now !!! We arrived at MH at 12ish ... I only allowed them to break for lunch after 3pm ... luckily for them Paul got a call out to go to a job ... so they escaped about 5pm .... and they found me in a shopping frenzy in New Look ... the dirty 4 letter word (SALE) having drawn me in there from when they left me !!!!

Me thinks Paul is now regretting having said"love it will be cheaper in the long run for you & Kelsey to come here cos I can still work while you guys are here" .... ooops me thinks perhaps I am spending more than he is making per day ROFLMAO !!!

We ate dinner at Frankie & Benny's and left MH at 10.30pm last night ... W.T.F and I still had to come home and ooh & aah over my purchases ... crashed knackered into bed after midnight ... how sad is that ???

I have been banned from spending anything today !!! In fact I'm at home ... Paul is out on a job, but I have asked if we can do something today that we never did in the 8years we lived here ... go to a car boot sale LOL ... so we're off to the one up at Twin Oaks when he gets back ... cash only there so ...I don't have much cash hehehe !!!